Papa

Sometimes when I sit down to pray, I feel like it’s the last thing I want to do. It’s hard to just sit there and get the words out of my mouth. I will read my Bible, put on my worship music, open my devotional, those things aren’t as difficult for me as talking to God is. What do I say? My prayers sound so boring and repetitive and  I use to feel so much shame because I would do a lot of my praying when:

1. I had really messed up

or

2. I was in a bad situation I couldn’t get myself out of.

The Father has never answered my, “So it’s been awhile" prayers with disappointment. He's never said, “Well, well, look who finally decided she needs My help.” Never. He always meets me with the same, “Aw, there she is!” Spirit.

His voice answering my guilt with, “I just love when you talk to Me. Read the phone book if you want too!”

One evening I was so frustrated. Why was it easy to open my Bible App but hard to actually open up my heart?

I heard James 4: 7-8 whispered to my heart, “So humble yourself before God. Resist the devil and he will flee from you. Get close to God and He will get close to you.”

I realized then, if there is one thing the enemy wants to thwart, interrupt and disable  it’s a simple, honest conversation between me and my Father. He can’t have me scooting close to God because when I do that, God automatically scoots closer to me and if we are both getting closer to each other….where will fear fit? Where will lies sneak in? Where will bitterness go?

If I’m sitting on the same bench as God that’s helpful. He’s there if I need Him. If I’m sitting next to Him that’s even better. I can hear what He has to say.  But if I am sitting in His lap-now that’s a closeness to the Father that would leave no room for even a snake to slither in .

In my mind, when we come before the Father. We are little children. We don’t have the vocabulary to communicate with Him as His equal anyways. We might as well just be small and real with Him. I know you might wear your nice clothes Sunday morning but when you curl up next to the Father in prayer, He’s interested in one thing. You. Your truest self. Your secrets. Your deepest inner being. The you that few see. He already has you memorized. There’s no need for games.

He is our Papa. If that’s hard to swallow, that’s ok but it doesn’t change Who He is. When you talk to Him-When you begin the prayer. Whether you are a four year old at bedtime or a Senator at the Capital-you are just one of His children. You both ask for similar things. You both have needs you can’t meet on your own, messes you can’t clean up without His help. People who have hurt you deeply and things in this world you don’t understand.

It’s ok. Your Father is here. He loves you fiercely. You can take off the mask, the cape or whatever-and just be His.

Song: You Know Me